Chalky water

All I can hear are her heels on the wooden floor in the kitchen as I'm considering de-calcing the kettle again she shouts upwards,

ARE YOU HAVING A COFFEE OR WHAT?

You see that's the trouble with the water in Nordrhein-Westfalen it's double chalky... Nowt like that lovely, cold, hard Manchester stuff. The water situation is so bad it almost makes me want to nip to MacDonalds for a brew.